| SomebodyWhoLoves 11.03.2007 16:10 |
Here's my version of TaylorMade's Restaurant story. HAHA Ok so we're in the restaurant. Freddie, Roger, and Kate just ordered their rather expensive meal. Roger: Um..I've got a call to make. Be right back. Freddie: [Smiles at Kate] I have to make a call too. Be right back. Kate: Takes out her compact mirror and stares into it, liking what she sees. [In the bathroom] Roger: [Looking at himself in the mirror, prawning before the full length mirror] [Freddie barges into the bathroom, scaring Roger] Roger: Whoo-HO! You scared me Freddie. Freddie: Blast it Roger. Look what you ordered. Look what I ordered. What are we going to do? Roger: Hmm..yeah. We're not exactly rolling around in money, are we? Well you started it. Noone said you had to order Lobster! Freddie: I was TRYING to impress her. You know, pretend we're rich. Oh Mama Mia Figaro!! Roger: Kate is hot. I'd love to bone her. Freddie: You'd love to bone everyone! Roger: [clears throat] Technically Freddie, You're the one who'd bone everyone. Freddie: Shut up! Roger: What are we going to do? We're SO broke. Freddie: I know! We'll scamper off! Roger: Ooh..that's so evil. I like it! Freddie: Either that or we'll both embarrass ourselves when the check comes. Which is it Roger? Roger: [Thinks...Reaches into his pockets and comes up with 3 dollars.] How much do you have Freddie? Freddie: [shakes his head no] I haven't got a penny on me. I'm broke as usual. Roger: Ok. let's get out of here and escape. [Both Freddie and Roger tip toe out of the bathroom, and head for the exit. Suddenly, Kate appears in front of them] Freddie, Roger: [Screams] Kate: Hi Guys, our food is here! let's go eat! [Freddie, Roger both walk back to their table, dejected. Their sharp hunger suddenly gone, replaced by stark terror] Kate: Mmm..this Lobster is SOOO good Freddie! you've made an excellent choice! Yummy. [chomp chomp] Freddie: [mumbles an unenthusiastic] Yeah..[chokes on his lobster, coughing] Roger: [Eats cheerfully, with a stupid smile on his face]. Come on Freddie. Might as well enjoy it. HAHA! [winks at Freddie] Freddie: [Gives Roger an evil look] Kate: [Looks at both guys. Thinks to herself: I can't believe I'm sitting here with two handsome guys, and they're so nice. They must be rich, eating at a place like this. I would so totally bone both of them! Which one should I do first?] Freddie: [Thinks to himself: This is so not going to end well..] Roger: [Happily chomps on his Shrimp.] This place is amazing. the food here is the best I've ever had! [Chomp Chomp] What will happen next? How will Freddie and Roger extricate themselves from this nightmare!! |
| deleted user 11.03.2007 16:24 |
The following is satire :
Freddie : "Let's get so toasted we don't know where we are !" Later... Roger : "Wow, she's preddy... I wunder ivshe likes me." Freddie : "Where om I, again ?" Roger : "Wow. You look realllly familiar." (Radio plays "You're My Best Friend") John : "Heeeey... ! Who's zhis on zhe radio ! - it's fantashtic..." Roger : (to Freddie) "You know, I'm in a band. A big bang - I - band." Freddie : "Oh my god - I hear myshelf, but I'm not talking... ! Now - it's like zhere's two of me ! TWO *hic* ! Of ME !" (giggles uncontrollably) Roger : "Hey... you know... I feel like we've known each other for a looooong time. *hic* A reeeally long time..." (leans in, kisses Freddie). Freddie : (Flails around, trys to hit Roger) Roger : "Whotz wrong ? *burp*" Freddie : "You're a woman !"I would post a more articulate satire, but I don't feel like digging it up - and the fact is, it horrifies me. Freddie : Are you sure you don't like the black kind with all the little straps and buckles ? You : No, not so comfortable looking, you know ? Freddie : What about the red kind with the bows we saw over there ? I don't really know about the bows, they're just a little silly-looking, but it's a really great shape. You : No, really too girly. I'm just not into that. Freddie : O ! Perfect-o - how about this leather kind ? The crinkliness and shininess work well together, don't you think ? You : A little too restrictive looking. I mean, how would I move ?! Freddie : Well... aren't we picky... I'm about to give up, you know. You : Ooo ! What about over there ? Freddie : Are you kidding ? You : Well... no... Freddie : Simply trashy ! And so cheap looking ! I don't know how anyone could stand to wear such a thing. You : O, fine. Freddie : Now, HERE we go - simply fantashtic ! The fur ! The curves ! The texture ! You : Oh, honestly, Freddie, you can't wear those to the prom. I don't care if they're Manolo Blahnik - he's not that great, anyway. Freddie : Well, aren't we poopy. We'll have to take an interim before going shoe-shopping together again...I thought it was cute. I honestly don't know why I'm posting. My head hurts and I'm tired and I need food. |
| SomebodyWhoLoves 11.03.2007 17:13 |
The Restaurant (Part 2) Freddie and Roger find themselves in a rather difficult situation. They've both ordered expensive meals to impress gorgeous Kate and have 3 dollars between them. Let's see what happens next! Freddie: [sarcastically] Roger, don't eat so fast. I don't want you to CHOKE to death. [glares at Roger] Roger: Mmm..Freddie, if I did choke, maybe Kate here will give me mouth to mouth and resucitate me. LOL [winks at Kate] Kate: keke! laughs, CHOMP CHOMP! [Makes a wicked chomping gesture with her mouth at Roger] Roger: [feigns choking] Freddie: Great. Just Great. While you two choke on each other orally, I'll die of a heart attack! Waiter: Would you gentleman like to order dessert? Roger: Yes! Freddie: No! Kate: Yes! Waiter: Great. We have tonight a very special dish. Strawberry Cheesecake Icecream! Or Walnut chocolate cake! Only 149.00. Which would you like to order? Kate, Roger: Cheesecake please! Sounds fabulous. Yummy! Freddie: [Thinks....] and suddenly says, 149.00 is that all? I'm in a nutty mood. Give me the nuts! Waiter:Fabulous choices sirs and madam. Freddie: Roger, I think we need to make that phone call again. Roger: Phone call? What phone call? [stares dreamily at Kate] Kate: [stares dreamily back at Roger] Freddie: You know! The PHONE call! [kicks roger under the table] Roger: Ow! Oh THAT phone call...ok be right back Kate. [smiles dreamily at Kate] [Freddie and Roger both leave for the bathroom. What will they do next?] |
| deleted user 11.03.2007 17:24 |
Are you trying to emulate a childish writing style ? Because I find it's more readable and scathing when you use "grown-up" techniques and such to really cut into whoever you're cutting at. |
| SomebodyWhoLoves 11.03.2007 17:38 |
I'm just doing this for fun. Yeah, my writing is sucky and childish, but I'm not seriously trying to write or anything. Otherwise, you wouldn't be able to follow it. |
| ScaramoucheFandango 11.03.2007 17:57 |
:) |
| QueenTaylor 11.03.2007 21:08 |
azzadude wrote: Then in the next moment, some Bozo said "I think freddie is Stupid" .. Then the guy who said it got shot. End of storylol^ |
| galileo_figaro_magnifico 11.03.2007 21:21 |
well SOME of us are enjoying the story and want to know how Freddie weasles his way out of the situation, so those of you who dont want to read it can go start your own story thread. *ahem* now then, carry on, dear! |
| deleted user 11.03.2007 21:25 |
SATIRE : THE MOST FUN YOU CAN HAVE WITHOUT A SHOCK WAND. |
| QueenTaylor 12.03.2007 15:06 |
azzadude wrote:^^^ lol..me too...and by the way...we have a story thread. : )galileo_figaro_magnifico wrote: well SOME of us are enjoying the story and want to know how Freddie weasles his way out of the situation, so those of you who dont want to read it can go start your own story thread. *ahem* now then, carry on, dear!Oh but wait, i did wanna hear the story, i also wanted to end it as well... eheheh |
| SomebodyWhoLoves 12.03.2007 16:42 |
The Restaurant Part 3 LOL Freddie and Roger are back in the bathroom, freaking out over a growing dinner tab they are unable to pay. Meanwhile, gorgeous Kate whose loveliness has smitten both Freddie and Roger think the boys are rich and handsome gentleman, and is vigorously staring into her compact mirror. Roger: Freddie, did you see Kate mouthing at me in a most deliciously erotic way? She so wants to bone me. [gives himself a look over in the mirror.] Freddie: Yeah, she's smitten over Mr 3 Dollar Man. Wait till she finds out what you're worth. [chuckles] Then she'll come running to ME!! [Preens in front of the mirror. Checking his teeth.] Roger: Wanna bet? [Still staring at the mirror] Freddie: Uhhhh...let me guess. [pauses, feigns thinking] 3 bucks? [Fixes his hair, smiles contently] Roger: At least I have 3 bucks, Mr shake his head make a stupid face I have nothing guy! Freddie: Roger, technically,you're like 9 THOOOSAND dollars below zero. And that's BEFORE tonight's bill! [laughs] Roger: We're SOOO screwed. Freddie: I gotta use the toilet. Roger: Me too. [There are two stalls in the bathroom, and a jacket hanger in the corner. It is an upscale lavishly furnished restroom.] Freddie [in stall #1]: We've got to put our enormous brains together and find a... Roger [in stall #2]: farts Freddie: Eww? Roger: err..sorry. I tried to do one of those silent farts but..hehe Freddie: I am SO going to drink tonight and get wasted. and forget this horror of a night! Roger: [farts again] sorry. Must be the shrimp. [A few minutes passes, and suddenly, the boys hear the door open, and footsteps approaching the stall.] Continued next time! :D |
| deleted user 12.03.2007 16:47 |
LOL. I'm liking this :P |