| Mr Mercury 02.06.2009 19:10 |
Women eh! They get - Boob-jobs, Nose-jobs Teeth bleaching, Tummy tucks Liposuction, Colonic irrigation Botox, Pierced ears Pierced nipples, Pierced bellies Pierced clits, Eyebrows plucked Bikini wax, Armpits shaved legs waxed, Lips tattooed Tits tattooed Arms tattooed Legs tattooed Lengthy diets Strenuous exercise And THEN they wont take it up the arse "because it hurts!" Its just a joke, ladies............ lol |
| Philly Guy 02.06.2009 19:16 |
You fool!! Women don't have feelings... Ding fries are done. I gotta run. **ZZZZOOOOOOOOOOMMMPPPPppppphhhhhh!!!!** |
| Mr Mercury 02.06.2009 19:34 |
Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighbouring kingdom. The monarch could have killed him but was moved by Arthur's youth and ideals. So, the monarch offered him his freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a year to figure out the answer and, if after a year, he still had no answer, he would be put to death. The question?....What do women really want? Such a question would perplex even the most knowledgeable man, and to young Arthur, it seemed an impossible query. But, since it was better than death, he accepted the monarch's proposition to have an answer by year's end. He returned to his kingdom and began to poll everyone: the princess, the priests, the wise men and even the court jester. He spoke with everyone, but no one could give him a satisfactory answer. Many people advised him to consult the old witch, for only she would have the answer. But the price would be high; as the witch was famous throughout the kingdom for the exorbitant prices she charged. The last day of the year arrived and Arthur had no choice but to talk to the witch. She agreed to answer the question, but he would have to agree to her price first. The old witch wanted to marry Sir Lancelot, the most noble of the Knights of the Round Table and Arthur's closest friend! Young Arthur was horrified. She was hunchbacked and hideous, had only one tooth, smelled like sewage, made obscene noises, etc. He had never encountered such a repugnant creature in all his life. He refused to force his friend to marry her and endure such a terrible burden; but Lancelot, learning of the proposal, spoke with Arthur. He said nothing was too big of a sacrifice compared to Arthur's life and the preservation of the Round Table. Hence, a wedding was proclaimed and the witch answered Arthur's question thus: What a woman really wants, she answered...is to be in charge of her own life. Everyone in the kingdom instantly knew that the witch had uttered a great truth and that Arthur's life would be spared. And so it was, the neighbouring monarch granted Arthur his freedom and Lancelot and the witch had a wonderful wedding. The honeymoon hour approached and Lancelot, steeling himself for a horrific experience, entered the bedroom. But, what a sight awaited him. The most beautiful woman he had ever seen lay before him on the bed. The astounded Lancelot asked what had happened The beauty replied that since he had been so kind to her when she appeared as a witch, she would henceforth, be her horrible deformed self only half the time and the beautiful maiden the other half. Which would he prefer? Beautiful during the day....or night? Lancelot pondered the predicament. During the day, a beautiful woman to show off to his friends, but at night, in the privacy of his castle, an old witch? Or, would he prefer having a hideous witch during the day, but by night, a beautiful woman for him to enjoy wondrous intimate moments? What would YOU do? Noble Lancelot said that he would allow HER to make the choice herself. Upon hearing this, she announced that she would be beautiful all the time because he had respected her enough to let her be in charge of her own life. Now....what is the moral to this story? The moral is..... If you don't let a woman have her own way.... Things are going to get ugly |
| «¤~Mrš. BÃD GÛŸ~¤» 02.06.2009 21:25 |
MEN!!!! |
| its_a_hard_life 26994 03.06.2009 03:56 |
«¤~Mrš. BÃD GÛŸ~¤» wrote: MEN!!!! |
| Mr Mercury 03.06.2009 04:31 |
«¤~Mrš. BÃD GÛŸ~¤» wrote: MEN!!!! They are just jokes I posted. I love women and all their peculiar little problems!!! |
| JoxerTheDeityPirate 03.06.2009 04:42 |
what women want,what they really really want is a zigger zig-ah. havent you learnt anything from the Spice Girls? :-p |
| Mr Mercury 03.06.2009 05:59 |
And when they let us know what that really is then we can get them one. lol |
| thomasquinn 32989 03.06.2009 07:44 |
What women want is in your genes. Or jeans. I don't remember which one. |
| john bodega 03.06.2009 09:23 |
Bitterness can make you say a lot of silly things, but there's no two ways about it - I love women, they're fucking great. They seem as bonkers as I must seem to them, sure, but that doesn't really curb my love of them. |
| Mr Mercury 03.06.2009 09:51 |
Zebonka12 wrote: Bitterness can make you say a lot of silly things, but there's no two ways about it - I love women, they're fucking great. They seem as bonkers as I must seem to them, sure, but that doesn't really curb my love of them. And that is the beauty of them, they are bonkers - in a nice way of course lol |
| Janet 04.06.2009 11:19 |
Mr Mercury wrote:Zebonka12 wrote: Bitterness can make you say a lot of silly things, but there's no two ways about it - I love women, they're fucking great. They seem as bonkers as I must seem to them, sure, but that doesn't really curb my love of them.And that is the beauty of them, they are bonkers - in a nice way of course lol Can't live with us, can't live without us? ;-) |
| @ndy38 04.06.2009 13:07 |
Janet wrote:Mr Mercury wrote:Can't live with us, can't live without us? ;-)Zebonka12 wrote: Bitterness can make you say a lot of silly things, but there's no two ways about it - I love women, they're fucking great. They seem as bonkers as I must seem to them, sure, but that doesn't really curb my love of them.And that is the beauty of them, they are bonkers - in a nice way of course lol Bingo. |
| JoxerTheDeityPirate 04.06.2009 14:23 |
Mr Mercury wrote:unless they live in Torquay!Zebonka12 wrote: Bitterness can make you say a lot of silly things, but there's no two ways about it - I love women, they're fucking great. They seem as bonkers as I must seem to them, sure, but that doesn't really curb my love of them.And that is the beauty of them, they are bonkers - in a nice way of course lol dont say i havent warned you *twists finger around at side of head and pokes tongue out * "cuckoo.cuckoo" |
| catqueen 04.06.2009 14:54 |
Mr Mercury wrote:
Women eh!
They get -
Boob-jobs, Nose-jobs
Teeth bleaching, Tummy tucks
Liposuction, Colonic irrigation
Botox, Pierced ears
Pierced nipples, Pierced bellies
Pierced clits, Eyebrows plucked
Bikini wax, Armpits shaved
legs waxed, Lips tattooed
Tits tattooed
Arms tattooed
Legs tattooed
Lengthy diets
Strenuous exercise
... And men think shaving is a nuisence. |
| Mr Mercury 04.06.2009 15:41 |
Catqueen wrote: ... And men think shaving is a nuisence.Not me. Sure some do though. |
| Mr Mercury 04.06.2009 15:43 |
Janet wrote:Mr Mercury wrote:Can't live with us, can't live without us? ;-)Zebonka12 wrote: Bitterness can make you say a lot of silly things, but there's no two ways about it - I love women, they're fucking great. They seem as bonkers as I must seem to them, sure, but that doesn't really curb my love of them.And that is the beauty of them, they are bonkers - in a nice way of course lol Janet dear, nobody could live without you - your the jewel in the crown!! :) |
| Janet 04.06.2009 16:20 |
Mr Mercury wrote:Janet wrote:Janet dear, nobody could live without you - your the jewel in the crown!! :)Mr Mercury wrote:Can't live with us, can't live without us? ;-)Zebonka12 wrote: Bitterness can make you say a lot of silly things, but there's no two ways about it - I love women, they're fucking great. They seem as bonkers as I must seem to them, sure, but that doesn't really curb my love of them.And that is the beauty of them, they are bonkers - in a nice way of course lol Aww..thank you! xox ;-) |
| beautifulsoup 04.06.2009 17:48 |
Edited out. Dang that editing feature... |
| magicalfreddiemercury 05.06.2009 15:20 |
Mr Mercury wrote: They are just jokes I posted. I love women and all their peculiar little problems!!! The "peculiar little problems" you refer to are otherwise known as "men". ;-) |
| «¤~Mrš. BÃD GÛŸ~¤» 05.06.2009 17:19 |
Mr Mercury wrote:Zebonka12 wrote: Bitterness can make you say a lot of silly things, but there's no two ways about it - I love women, they're fucking great. They seem as bonkers as I must seem to them, sure, but that doesn't really curb my love of them.And that is the beauty of them, they are bonkers - in a nice way of course And our bonkers is what can get us gals noticed.....if ya know what I mean...lol |
| Mr Mercury 05.06.2009 17:40 |
«¤~Mrš. BÃD GÛŸ~¤» wrote:Mr Mercury wrote: And that is the beauty of them, they are bonkers - in a nice way of courseAnd our bonkers is what can get us gals noticed.....if ya know what I mean...lol Yep and thats why most men can only count up to two! lol :) |
| thomasquinn 32989 06.06.2009 05:36 |
"Yep and thats why most men can only count up to two!" Oh, but we're just a little more sophisticated than that: One Two Many Lots |