seems appropriate as it was his birthday this week to have a new Fatty tale with a nod and a wink in the direction of Terry Wogan and his Janet and John tales:
so get pull up a chair and get comfy and enjoy ;-]
it was Fatty's birthday this week and Janet had started a birthday thread for him.she had also sent him a book on birds.do you like birds? Fatty does,especially small Aussie ones [see pix of Danni and Kylie].
Fatty is on holiday in Cornwall and as the weather is nice he decides to go for a walk and see what birds he can find on his journey.he puts on his finest pink wellie boots and a big duffel coat with the mittens on strings attached to the sleeves of the coat.do you know what "care in the community" is? Janet does..
Fatty walks down towards the cliffs at Kynance cove as he has heard stories of good wildlife being found there.its not long before he sees an unusual looking black bird [see naomi campbell].
he gets out his book from Janet and recognises it as the Cornish National bird.he watches it for a while and sees that the bird is building a home in a nice cornish hedgerow [see the punchline]..
after a short time Fatty gets bored watching the blackbird and carries on with his coastal walk and soon bumps into fellow QueenZoner Joxer.Joxer also likes to look at Cornish birds [see George Clooney].
Fatty asks him what he is up to and Joxer explains that he is looking for Colombian bananas that may have been washed ashore.he also says that he has seen a couple of Cornish seagulls on the rocks below and has taken a couple of pictures to show his friends.Fatty asks Joxer if he can see the pictures and Joxer abliges,fatty is impressed but says he has to go as its getting late and Janet doesnt like him out alone after dark [see fattys tale of QZ teenage abuse]..
later when he is online Janet asks him what he did that day...
"well" says Fatty,"i went for a walk along the cliff and i saw a Cornish Chough.it had a lovely bush around its nest.i had a closer look through my binoculars and it did look awesome.its the first time i have seen a black bird with such a pretty bush"
"i then went for a stroll along the cliff and met Joxer who had taken pictures of a couple of Cornish Shags on the rocks below.they were very impressive."
can you make a growling noise and hit a man on the head with a bird table from 3000 miles away?
Janet can..
That's the nicest birthday present anyone's ever given me. Thanks Joxer (gently puching you in the arm) Ya big lug.
And Jake. If you ever open my birthday present again I'll rip your fucking man-boobs off and ram them up your hole.
fatty.
That is awesome!! Apparently you've still been listening to Janet and John since I left your place Joxer. Glad to know you are still learning :-)
I love you guy's sense of humor