I know this is a very strange and odd topic to be asking for advice on, but it's a lot easier to ask people I don't really know and don't see than people I see everyday. Anyways, here is my problem:
One of my oldest and closest friends was killed on her way to classes, October 8. She lived in St. Augustine, while I'm in Tallahassee for school, and I wasn't even able to get a ride back for her funeral. We were friends since our freshman year in high school, and we did everything - from orchestra to tours to ski trips and spring break vacations - together. She wasn't really close with her dad, but she was fairly close to her step-mom, who I haven't seen for almost two months.
My question is, how do I talk to her step-mom? I want to let her know that I am thinking of her and praying for her, and am more than willing to do whatever she needs at any time. But, beyond a very stiff and general letter, I haven't been able to do that yet. And also, I haven't the slightest clue how to send my friend's dad condolences: I only met him once in five years.
She was my best friend, from the time I was thirteen, until now. She was my concertmaster, my section leader, my bus partner, and the only person who could ever get me to skip class. She taught me the basics of pizzicato, and stood up for me when other violinists said I was only on viola due to a lack of talent. She snuck me Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings books in church, and watched Music of the Heart with me everytime I came over. There are a million memories more, and I know that her step-mom has to be feeling it even more than I am. She's the first person I've ever really known who's died, and I just don't know what to do for her step-mom now.
So, if anyone has any advice, I would be so very grateful. I'm about the farthest thing from eloquent imaginable, but I want to manage, somehow, to offer Ms. Laurie just a little bit of comfort.
Thank you all,
Judy (MetzgerR)
That post was far from being stiff and general, and was completely eloquent in its own way. I would suggest a letter very similar to what you posted here.
And I'm sorry for your loss.
Once again, I agree with Zeni. Zeni you really ought to think about charging for advice!! ;)
I would write a nice letter if you aren't comfortable speaking with her.
I am sorry for your loss.
I also agree with Zeni. If you can put your thoughts about your friend on paper, in the same way you have done here, then Im sure your friends step mum, and her father would take great comfort in reading it.
So sad.