Queen Archivist 30.07.2008 11:49 |
I have just purchased a custard tart. It is tasteless. Without flavour. Devoid of a treat for the taste buds. Flavoursome, it is NOT. Bakers out there... please tell me why this is. What has happened? They used to be delicious but now they're bland and taste as much of custard, or ANYTHING AT ALL, as a garden spade tastes of custard. Someone out there knows why. Please inform me. Finally... 1. For all those of you shouting at your spit-covered screen, "POST IT IN THE RIGHT AREA!" I have. This is the right place. This is SERIOUS. 2. For those thinking of a joke about being fat, overweight, etc... GB ate all the pies/cakes... please do try to make it original this time. FUNNY would be great, but usually we get dull, predictable and completely unoriginal. Please try hard. And then harder. 3. Yes, I have got better things to do, but I have a power cut in the house (since 3.10 approx) and am writing this on my laptop in the garden (using someone else's wireless broadband - what a fiend I am). I have a VAST garden you know!!!! 260 acres or something like that. And abundant cattle. 4. Tell me where I can get a GREAT custard tart. I'll send you a rare Queen CD if you can. |
Pim Derks 30.07.2008 12:10 |
Ah yes, another day in the life of Greg Brooks. Eating tarts, posting rants aimed at the wrong people, behaving like a complete moron. You might wonder 'Isn't there something better this guy has to do...?' |
new one 30.07.2008 12:14 |
This is a strnage one to be responing to. Given that custard is made from egg yolk, cream/milk,sugar and vanilla I suggest that your one is simply lacking in either sugar or vanilla. Go to a good quality bakers and you should get a nice one or even better make your own. But don't skimp on the vanilla or sugar. A nice touch is to caramelise the topp using demerara sugar and a very hot grill or blow torch. I would imagine someone like Delia would have a good recipe. Plus I aggree that the seriousness of a topic is definetly in the eye of the beholder |
Raf 30.07.2008 13:41 |
Queen Archivist wrote: 1. For all those of you shouting at your spit-covered screen, "POST IT IN THE RIGHT AREA!" I have. This is the right place. This is SERIOUS.Well, this might be serious, but how is it related to Queen? This area isn't for ANY serious topic, but for Queen-related serious topics. And the fact that you're their archivist doesn't automatically make whatever you eat a serious Queen-related subject. |
Raf 30.07.2008 13:46 |
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cmsdrums 30.07.2008 15:33 |
Having seen Andi Peters on Masterchef last week making a proper, genuine custard tart (ie like a pie that is cut into slices and not one of these little individual 'tartlettes' I think you have a problem with), I can vouch, on the advice of the genuine master chef watching over him, that a custard tart is actually very very tricky to make. I would suggest that your baker is probably not a highly skilled chef, but a greasy haired spotty school leaving oik in an apron (ie not a master baker, but something similar sounding). Herein lies your dilemma - to get a genuine proper custard tart you need to buy from a specialist, and not your local co-op, Mace etc... I would suggest Fortnum and Mason on Piccadilly (or try asking Andi Peters to knock one up for you (make sure you correctly use UP, and not OUT though in that request) or you may get a completely different kind of sticky sweet surprise.... good day Sir |
Mr Mercury 30.07.2008 15:38 |
Raf wrote:I will attempt to make it Queen related then. Freddie once called some fans at a concert a "load of tarts". Trouble is, I cant remember which one. Can someone help me at all?Queen Archivist wrote: 1. For all those of you shouting at your spit-covered screen, "POST IT IN THE RIGHT AREA!" I have. This is the right place. This is SERIOUS.Well, this might be serious, but how is it related to Queen? This area isn't for ANY serious topic, but for Queen-related serious topics. And the fact that you're their archivist doesn't automatically make whatever you eat a serious Queen-related subject. Will that do for starters, Raf? :) |
daffy_the_duck 30.07.2008 16:57 |
Earls court |
Mr Mercury 30.07.2008 18:02 |
Thanks Daffy. |
Micrówave 30.07.2008 18:31 |
Queen Archivist wrote: I have just purchased a custard tart. It is tasteless. Without flavour. Devoid of a treat for the taste buds. Flavoursome, it is NOT.Greg, YOU are a custard tart. Tasteless Without flavour Devoid of a treat for Queenzone Perhaps if YOU started doing something more productive, the tarts you're disappointed in would taste better. Have a great day and maybe mix in a salad. |
Crazy LittleThing 31.07.2008 00:03 |
Perhaps Greg MEANT to post this on the "Lionel from 'As Time Goes By" Serious Discussion" page? Lionel is quite serious about his custard tarts. To be fair, he DOES seem to be waving a "Queen rarity" in the path of one who can point him to a GREAT custard tart, which could be seen as being both Queen-related and serious if he intends to make good on his offer. |
Pim Derks 31.07.2008 01:46 |
I bet Greg would say that the custard tart got lost and that's why you're not getting a rare Queen track. |
A Word In Your Ear 31.07.2008 09:08 |
Wierd thing, I have just purchased a box of Mr. Kiplings, custard tarts & in the ingredients, it just says "Property Of Queen Produtions" ;-) |
Winter Land Man 31.07.2008 10:53 |
Greg Brooks video tapes himself jerking off and cumming on Queen albums and posts the videos on adult video sites!!!! Just kidding. |
wrak 31.07.2008 11:44 |
hm, this is getting kind of weird... *deep breath* awh, I still wish that this forum was moderated, atleast... somewhat. I know, I sound like a whiner, but... sorry... I'm getting "a tad bit" frustrated with this "Greg Brooks" troll. with lovefull and queenzone:ified regards. /sami |
StoneColdClassicQueen 31.07.2008 18:07 |
Micrówave wrote:XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDQueen Archivist wrote: I have just purchased a custard tart. It is tasteless. Without flavour. Devoid of a treat for the taste buds. Flavoursome, it is NOT.Greg, YOU are a custard tart. Tasteless Without flavour Devoid of a treat for Queenzone Perhaps if YOU started doing something more productive, the tarts you're disappointed in would taste better. Have a great day and maybe mix in a salad. nice... |
Penetration_Guru 31.07.2008 18:54 |
Custard is overrated. You want a jam tart. |
Queen Archivist 31.07.2008 19:42 |
Pim Derks wrote: Ah yes, another day in the life of Greg Brooks. Eating tarts, posting rants aimed at the wrong people, behaving like a complete moron. You might wonder 'Isn't there something better this guy has to do...?'I refer you to my Point 3, above. |
Queen Archivist 31.07.2008 19:43 |
new one wrote: This is a strnage one to be responing to. Given that custard is made from egg yolk, cream/milk,sugar and vanilla I suggest that your one is simply lacking in either sugar or vanilla. Go to a good quality bakers and you should get a nice one or even better make your own. But don't skimp on the vanilla or sugar. A nice touch is to caramelise the topp using demerara sugar and a very hot grill or blow torch. I would imagine someone like Delia would have a good recipe. Plus I aggree that the seriousness of a topic is definetly in the eye of the beholderVERY WELL SAID, NEW ONE. YOU HAVE A SENSE A HUMOUR TOO... SADLY LACKING ON THIS SITE, DON'T YOU THINK. WE SHOULD START OUR OWN CLUB. |
Queen Archivist 31.07.2008 19:45 |
Raf wrote:YES IT DOES. OF COURSE IT DOES. I AM QUEEN'S ARCHIVIST. THEIR ACTUAL ARCHIVIST. DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND.Queen Archivist wrote: 1. For all those of you shouting at your spit-covered screen, "POST IT IN THE RIGHT AREA!" I have. This is the right place. This is SERIOUS.Well, this might be serious, but how is it related to Queen? This area isn't for ANY serious topic, but for Queen-related serious topics. THIS BIT>>> And the fact that you're their archivist doesn't automatically make whatever you eat a serious Queen-related subject. |
Queen Archivist 31.07.2008 19:46 |
cmsdrums wrote: Having seen Andi Peters on Masterchef last week making a proper, genuine custard tart (ie like a pie that is cut into slices and not one of these little individual 'tartlettes' I think you have a problem with), I can vouch, on the advice of the genuine master chef watching over him, that a custard tart is actually very very tricky to make. I would suggest that your baker is probably not a highly skilled chef, but a greasy haired spotty school leaving oik in an apron (ie not a master baker, but something similar sounding). Herein lies your dilemma - to get a genuine proper custard tart you need to buy from a specialist, and not your local co-op, Mace etc... I would suggest Fortnum and Mason on Piccadilly (or try asking Andi Peters to knock one up for you (make sure you correctly use UP, and not OUT though in that request) or you may get a completely different kind of sticky sweet surprise.... good day SirEXCELLENT!!!!! THANK YOU VERY MUCH. |
john bodega 31.07.2008 22:48 |
Queen Archivist wrote: YES IT DOES. OF COURSE IT DOES. I AM QUEEN'S ARCHIVIST. THEIR ACTUAL ARCHIVIST. DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND.I AM AN ACTUAL ROBOT. COMPUTE. |
inu-liger 01.08.2008 02:30 |
Zebonka12 wrote:COMPUTE PHAIL.Queen Archivist wrote: YES IT DOES. OF COURSE IT DOES. I AM QUEEN'S ARCHIVIST. THEIR ACTUAL ARCHIVIST. DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND.I AM AN ACTUAL ROBOT. COMPUTE. LOAD BACKUP. BACKUP CORRUPT. DO NOT WANT. *BLUE SCREEN* |
Charlie Brown 02.08.2008 00:57 |
May i suggest that if decent tarts can't be found go for ice cream instead. Or if decent tarts can be found couple tart with ice cream for a true treat. Tarts containing fresh fruit. Why do people in Britain like jam and custard, pudding so much anyway? And why baked beans for breakfast? |
Markman38 02.08.2008 11:14 |
Greg try the apple pie from Bakkerij Kuyt in Amsterdam the hext time you visit that city (if you ever do), then you will forget your appetite for the custard pie. Better advice you won't get (LOL) |
Winter Land Man 03.08.2008 18:01 |
Ahhh-Ooooo Werewolves of London! |
oh-ja 08.08.2008 16:55 |
don't feed the troll ... he's not worth it ... |
its_a_hard_life 26994 08.08.2008 17:06 |
inu-liger wrote:LMAO.....Zebonka12 wrote:COMPUTE PHAIL. LOAD BACKUP. BACKUP CORRUPT. DO NOT WANT. *BLUE SCREEN*Queen Archivist wrote: YES IT DOES. OF COURSE IT DOES. I AM QUEEN'S ARCHIVIST. THEIR ACTUAL ARCHIVIST. DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND.I AM AN ACTUAL ROBOT. COMPUTE. |
Brian_Mays_Wig 09.08.2008 06:52 |
Its got to be a vanilla slice every time ;o) |
kagezan1313 23.08.2008 19:37 |
I was watching Futurama last night, and it was an episode where Leela was dating the mayor's aide. And everywhere they went, he would go on and on about his power as the mayor's aide. He even had a shiny badge that got him prime seating at empty restaurants, and such. I can't help but see a parallel between him and Mr. Brooks. |
Donna13 24.08.2008 19:54 |
I was watching the Independent Film Channel - I think it was last night, but maybe it was the night before, or the night before that. I think they should rename it the Disturbing Film Channel. Anyway, I decided to remove it from my channels list because before it was just above the Weather Channel and I always got a big shock every time I hit the channel up button: somebody being stabbed, some weird unhappy scene (on the Independent Film Channel I mean, not the Weather Channel). Anyway ... |
Adolfo and the spiders from Mercury 25.08.2008 02:24 |
this guy should really get fired, of course on the other hand, most "queen fans" are also retarded morons, so I believe everyone get what they deserve Still, I think the archivist should be replaced |
kagezan1313 25.08.2008 05:18 |
It would be cool if the Archivist was replaced with the Architect from The Matrix! "Concordantly, I have arranged distribution of Houston '77, vis a vis the next DVD release, through Queen Productions, ergo I am inexorably more kick-ass than Greg Brooks." |
LyricHunger 25.08.2008 08:19 |
Ah, I sense relief: GB has much time on his hands, that means that the new material is being archived by someone else. Hope the NEW guy will get the keys to the long-unope'd back room. |
Micrówave 25.08.2008 19:01 |
Queen Archivist wrote:So have you sent CMSDRUMS the rare CD yet? What was on it? Innuendo Explosive Version?cmsdrums wrote: Having seen Andi Peters on Masterchef last week making a proper, genuine custard tart (ie like a pie that is cut into slices and not one of these little individual 'tartlettes' I think you have a problem with), I can vouch, on the advice of the genuine master chef watching over him, that a custard tart is actually very very tricky to make. I would suggest that your baker is probably not a highly skilled chef, but a greasy haired spotty school leaving oik in an apron (ie not a master baker, but something similar sounding). Herein lies your dilemma - to get a genuine proper custard tart you need to buy from a specialist, and not your local co-op, Mace etc... I would suggest Fortnum and Mason on Piccadilly (or try asking Andi Peters to knock one up for you (make sure you correctly use UP, and not OUT though in that request) or you may get a completely different kind of sticky sweet surprise.... good day SirEXCELLENT!!!!! THANK YOU VERY MUCH. |