Thank Coach for this one-
Larry gets home late one night and his wife, Linda, says, Where in the hell have you been?"
Larry replies, "I was out getting a tattoo."
"A tattoo?" she frowned. "What kind of tattoo did you get?"
"I got a hundred dollar bill on my privates," he said proudly.
"What the hell were you thinking?" she said, shaking her head in disdain. "Why on earth would an accountant get a hundred dollar bill tattooed on his privates?"
He replied
-Well, one, I like to watch my money grow.
-Two, once in awhile I like to play with my money.
-Three, I like how money feels in my hand.
-And, lastly, instead of you going out shopping, you can stay right here at home and blow a hundred bucks anytime you want.