What's the largest object you have inserted into your ear?
How many times a day do you use the word "rhubarb"?
When was the last time you saw a dog turd with a lolly stick poking out of it?
Are you sexually aroused by the theme tune to Coronation Street?
Have you ever killed anyone using only your thumbs?
What's the furthest you have ever thrown an elderly relative?
How long can you hold your breath for?
Which of the following sticky substances would you rather be immersed in? Golden Syrup or treacle.
How much Dundee cake can you eat without needing a glass of water?
Can you bite your own toenails?
Would you bite mine?
Why isn't Keith Chegwin the head of the Metropolitan Police Force?
Is it just me, or is this lump on my neck getting bigger?
Can you speak up? I'm a little hard of hearing.
Why can't geese play Kerplunk?
Have you ever fantasised about lesbian sex with 2 men?
Where the fuck is my Pink Floyd mug?
fatty.
What's the largest object you have inserted into your ear? my big toe
How many times a day do you use the word "rhubarb"? quite often. its fun to say
When was the last time you saw a dog turd with a lolly stick poking out of it? two weeks ago
Are you sexually aroused by the theme tune to Coronation Street? only on thursdays
Have you ever killed anyone using only your thumbs? do the homeless count
What's the furthest you have ever thrown an elderly relative? 5.6ft
How long can you hold your breath for? 2.459 minutes
Which of the following sticky substances would you rather be immersed in? Golden Syrup or treacle. i guess treacle because i haven't tried that one
How much Dundee cake can you eat without needing a glass of water? 37 cakes
Can you bite your own toenails? yep
Would you bite mine? hell yeah
Why isn't Keith Chegwin the head of the Metropolitan Police Force? he didn't eat his beans
Is it just me, or is this lump on my neck getting bigger? i didn't want to say anything but...
Can you speak up? I'm a little hard of hearing. i am speaking up
Why can't geese play Kerplunk? they don't have thumbs
Have you ever fantasised about lesbian sex with 2 men? does watched count as fantasised
Where the fuck is my Pink Floyd mug? try looking under the sink
There, the most random questionare i have ever taken
Right, okay...
What's the largest object you have inserted into your ear?
A baked bean
How many times a day do you use the word "rhubarb"?
Approx 7
When was the last time you saw a dog turd with a lolly stick poking out of it?
Twenty minutes ago
Are you sexually aroused by the theme tune to Coronation Street?
Don't know it, but probably
Have you ever killed anyone using only your thumbs?
No
What's the furthest you have ever thrown an elderly relative?
6ft10
How long can you hold your breath for?
50 secs
Which of the following sticky substances would you rather be immersed in? Golden Syrup or treacle.
Treacle
How much Dundee cake can you eat without needing a glass of water?
3.5 metres (16 pints)
Can you bite your own toenails?
Yes
Would you bite mine?
No
Why isn't Keith Chegwin the head of the Metropolitan Police Force?
Because Sir Ian Blair is
Is it just me, or is this lump on my neck getting bigger?
No, I think it is getting bigger
Can you speak up? I'm a little hard of hearing.
YES, I CAN
Why can't geese play Kerplunk?
They can
Have you ever fantasised about lesbian sex with 2 men?
I have now
Where the fuck is my Pink Floyd mug?
On the mug tree or in the fridge
Thanks, fatty, hilarious as ever.