|Last night I was watching this TV movie called "Odd Girl Out" on Lifetime (yes, straight guys can also watch Lifetime).
Anyways, the movie was about this teen girl who gets constantly bullied by former friends who think she's flirting with a guy that one of her ex-friends happens to like. They make her life a living hell by constantly calling her names, spreading false rumors about her, pulling pranks on her, and harassing her in every single way possible. The worst part of all is that this girl still tries to remain friends with these bitches despite of every single bad they do to her, and she ends up becoming extremely gullible about every single lie that her old friends would tell her in order to make her think that they're still "friends", which leads this girl into more pain and driving her into a complete state of depression.
Just wondering if anyone here (for both guys and girls) has ever been a victim of bullies in school? If so, do you still feel scared by those painful memories from the past.
|That was an excellent story Barry.
Was it sent by a fan?
|Wow.. I thought you were just a wimp Barry but bugger me dead if that didn't choke me up.
|Now that's a good Internet story.
|My brother is being bullied by some kid. He's only in the sixth grade. I only stuck up for my brother once, and I guess that made it all worse.
My mum rented some bullying videos, and I guess she's going to try to show his principal, but I REALLY don't think that'll do anything. THAT might make it worse. But so far, I've had a few conversations with Nate (a.k.a. the bully) pretending to live somewhere else and not be related. But then I just blocked him on account of my mum finding out and scolding me to stay out of it.
|Crap! I was planning on watching that last night! I watched "Soldier's Girl" instead...
|I read a story not too long ago about a new internet bully fad that is happening lately. Apparently they send abusive pms, emails, texts, etc., to the victims and then they spread lies about them over the internet and at the schools that the kids attend. They said one boy, who was much smaller than other kids, committed suicide because he couldn't take the verbal abuse anymore. I can't believe the lengths that some kids go to to make other kids' lives unhappy. They obviously have low self-esteem themselves or else they wouldn't be abusing others for being different.
|Oh, and I have never been bullied. I have had run-ins with other women in college who seem to enjoy being rude and insulting towards me, but this hardly can be considered bullying. But I can easily see the situation from that movie actually happening. Men hurt other men with their hands, women hurt other women by playing with their minds.
SergeantPepperDG wrote: Crap! I was planning on watching that last night! I watched "Soldier's Girl" instead...They might show it again in the next days, so check your local listings.
This is a movie that I feel every kid and every parent should watch.
|I was bullied once by this kid and I ended up beating HIM up...How great am I!
<font color=purple>Miss James wrote: I read a story not too long ago about a new internet bully fad that is happening lately. Apparently they send abusive pms, emails, texts, etc., to the victims and then they spread lies about them over the internet and at the schools that the kids attend. They said one boy, who was much smaller than other kids, committed suicide because he couldn't take the verbal abuse anymore. I can't believe the lengths that some kids go to to make other kids' lives unhappy. They obviously have low self-esteem themselves or else they wouldn't be abusing others for being different.Good thing you mentioned that, Amanda.
On this movie that I watched last night, it showed that the internet era has certainly made things worse when it comes to confronting bullies, and it is certainly harder to catch one.
A good example of this is our beloved, Jake Britt.
|But that was 10 years ago... :-)
|Pretty great story. I've been there, on the side of Kyle. It wasn't fun.
|My first school memory is infact of being bullied (won't get into what for, but not a fun way to start school with tears in your eyes), but after that and some other minor incidents with mainly older pupils I was left alone thanks to the wonderful teacher I had.
Come 4th grade of elementary school, the old teacher is gone with the wind. The school principal does two jobs, one of them is being the principal and the other is being our teacher. Everybody could tell that would suck ;-)
My classmates learned that I'd move and had to change to a different school district, that seemed to set something on fire. Pretty much everyone turned against me, a new kid in the class also seemed to be a master of manipulating other children into joining the ranks. I was pretty much the regular target for verbal and physical abuse, always done by several other boys against me. I was not a small kid by any means and alone I could whoop ass as anyone else. And I did do my share of revenges when I caught someone alone and for that I got into trouble, as some teachers SAW me as the problem then. Eitherway, school was hell in the 4th. I was scared of going there, it's evident from my school photos that something changed. Looking back I seemed terribly unhappy, whereas I had been somewhat of a smiley blonde boy before.
The principal who tought most subjects was absent because of his job as a principal running the school, so he left us unmonitored and that certainly gave the idiots a good chance to have a go at me.
Having pretty much been abused out of my self-esteem I had to go to a new school, that class surely was not a picknick. In 5th I soon became the easy target for the kids of that class. They knew I'd give them the reaction their sadistic little minds wanted. I was very sensitive, I guess they could smell that :-P
By sixth I had gotten a long a bit better but was still pretty much the OUTSIDER as I had been made into in the new school. I had a few friends, but they weren't in a position to defend me in anyway. And of course I was not given a chance to go forth with these people, as the school decided that people who live off a certain distrcit would start 7th in the school downtown. I definitely did not need another school change and a new set of faces.
From 13-16 then, well it was more verbal abuse and singling out/outcasting. It was very heavy, make no mistake about it. And my bullies were never the tought guys who'd go to juvinile-hall :-P They were ordinarey students, the one's the teachers liked.
I've read alot of studies about bullying myself, I can't say I'm surprised that studies over here show that especially many male teachers believe that there are absolutely no innocent victims among the bullied kids. They think of them as "provocative victims" and such. That explains why they never ever did anything to put a stop to the shit that I had to go through. And they damn well did know about it. It was always "boys will be boys", "shake hands and be pals" and blah blah
I do feel the effects of bullying in my everyday social life and am in therapy, which I'm glad. Oh and nowadays I don't take shit from anyone, I've had my share for this life. Yes, I will resort to violence. Not kidding one bit. Yes, I'm a bit crazy ;-)
Anyway, that was a short summary of my experiences. I've written a short-novel (almost) about it in my own language. Not something you'd want to read or experience yourself, trust me.
I personally think that the only way teachers are going to start taking bullying seriously is when they are punished for doing their job badly.
They are supposed to be an authority and the school must provide everyone an equal and SAFE learning enviroment. I think teachers who fail in that should be given deductions in their wages, perhaps that would encourage them to truly put a stop to cases. So no-one would have to go for several years as being the general spitting cup as I did.
|Last year, I had a hell of a time fitting in anywhere because I suddenly switched middle schools. There was no room for a gawky, geeky girl who tripped over her own feet on a regular basis. But no bullying, just a whole lot of cold shouldering.
|The trick with bullying is to go and murder the bullies parents. Both of them. That way they will learn that it rubs the lotion into its body or it gets the hose again.
|In school I always suffered because I never wanted to be the same like the others. Some teachers liked me being different, but others hated it (you know, after a really long communist rule, someone that tries to step out from the crowd must be "killed"), and encouraged my coleagues to be mean to me. At first I was always hurt, and went home and cried, but then I realized I was smarter than them, and I shouldn't give them satisfaction and decided not to give a f*ck about it. Now in university people really appreciate me for being me and this is quite amazing for me. :D
|That sucks. That's why I love living in the good AU of S. Yeee-haw!
|I was bullied all of middle school just about every day. Now in high school it is not as bad because my brother was a senior last year(my first year), and the people who bullied me were either scared of him or thought he was the cooliest person in the school. This year it can still be bad because I often go aginst everyone else at my school if what they are doing is wrong. Of couse this all started when i stopped some people from picking on one of my friends.
|I was pretty much bullied all throughout middle school, but I haven't had to deal with that for years. It doesn't really hurt me to think about it anymore, cause it was so long ago that it feels like it happened to someone else. Also, I know that it could never happen to me nowadays, cause I'm more confident in sticking up for myself, and I have some really great friends who would back me up. Plus, most people my age are mature enough not to do that, and I'm not as much of an obvious nerd anymore.
|Being bullied for so many years is the reason why I have very low self esteem.
Yogurt wrote: Being bullied for so many years is the reason why I have very low self esteem.same here.
but now i'm workin on that
|i have. i think a lot of people have.
you've just gotta decide not to care anymore. i did. if something's wrong u tell them. they shouldnt be able to walk all over you.
if you stand up to the hardest one then the rest feel like they cant do a thing. you might as well go for it? whats the worst that can happen?
it worked for me anyway.
|it worked for me too, but i can still feel the effects, even now that i have passed through it... :S
|they still occasionally pick me as their victim of the day but i dont care now. i dont need them.
i'm just glad i stand up for myself now.
my best friend helps a lot now too. she gets bullied all the time.
i remember once my friend said she wanted to kill one of the bullies. they overheard and four of the beat her up when she was on her own.
they can be so cruel.
|if u can't beat them join them!!!!!!!!!!
|i used to be bullied by my 'friends' cos i had epilepsy, which i was EXTREMELY sensitive about, i've recovered from that now though and have gradually got back my self-confidence. took bloody ages though. some people must have no conscience, but i suppose the way we cope with them determines who we turn out to be.
|Lady Cool Cat
|In my school, no-one likes to play with me, they call me a nerd, just because I wear glasses, and just because of that, nobody wants me in any team when we play games...They say I suck, and when they put me on ANY team, they moan, and ignore me..in dodgeball, they don't aim for me..only when they are desperate..:((
|When I was about 12 I was one of the smart kids in my class and got picked on because I did homework and was polite to the teacher etc. Most of it happened on the bus by a girl named Ariana who was so fat she took up a whole seat herself who pointed out cows and said "hey look it's your family" or other such stuff.
So a lot of the time I'd do the classic "Mum I'm sick" thing or piss around so much she'd have to drop me off. I can't quite remember what actually happened but I think I eventually told her and she went to the principal about it. He came to our class, got me, spoke to me, then got Ariana and told her he wanted a stop to it. She denied it and he shouted loud enough for several classes to hear, "DON'T LIE, YOU STUPID GIRL!" That scared her enough that she did stop and all was well.
That taught me a valuable lesson: don't try to deal with shit on your own.
|I've had extremley low self esteem for almost 6 years now. Its a result to bulling.
It's easy to say, "Ok, I'm going to forget all about it."
But its hard to actually do it.
|It's sad how people even resort to bullying and insulting even as they become adults. I have met some women quite recently who find enjoyment in making fun of my height and have implied that I am a "goody-two-shoes." I suppose my obvious retort back to them is that they are juvenile, immature people because they still resort to insulting other people like a bunch of fifth graders.
|I've never been the victim of a bully and have never EVER bullied anyone else. I am not sure where my attitude came from as my mom is the sweetest person on the planet and my dad is very quiet and reserved; but I'd not want to be on the other end of his anger. Neither of my parents instructed me to stick up for myself or to defend myself...it just seemed to come natural to me. I thought from the start of my life that my shit simply did not stink and no one was ever going to tell me different. I am not sure if I displayed that on my face or what but no one ever bothered me.
I attended the same schools my whole life. I lived in the same house from the time I was 2 years old until I was 21 years old so I never had to be the new kid. For some reason I could feel the pain of that "new kid." Whenever we got a new student at my school I would make sure I spoke to them, invited them to eat lunch with my friends and I, and just in general came to them. I did not smother them or scare them, but I made sure I was at the very least, cordial and welcoming. I was taught to treat others as you want to be treated. I had NO tolerance for my classmates that would bully new students or other students in general. I had no problem letting other students "know" that I had issues with them being ASSHOLES and to stop before I get in the middle of it. Some of you on here might already realize that I am quite the accomplished bitch if need be. Some of you also know that I am a social worker in an elementary school. Bullying is NOT by ANY means tolerated in my school. Our administrators and teachers simply do not put up with it. If it is discovered that another student is bullying another, it is dealt with IMMEDIATELY and STOPPED. We have regular seminars quarterly on bullying for the children. I have to say we do not have many bullying problems. I hope it is bc we simply do not tolerate it. In my school EVERY child has a right to learn in a safe environment, at the very least. If another child(ren) decides they want to interupt the every day learning of another child, then gladly that child can do their work at home while on suspension. I agree with Pete when he says it IS the responsibility of teachers and administrators at schools to ensure the safety and well being of the students while at school and I also believe that duty carrys over to their homes. My job does NOT stop when the students board the bus and go home. If I suspect something is going on in the home of one of my students then I will be knocking on the door of that student. I will go in and talk to the parents, look around, see if there is food in the house, and see if it is free of bugs and harmful substances. If the parent will not allow me in then I call the Sheriff, he meets me at the home, and we are "let" in.
As you can tell, this is something I feel strongly about. I wish every child had the same wonderful experiences I had in school. I had minimal problems in school and I never bothered anyone else. But if you did attempt to bother me, you wouldn't try it again after suffering the consequences. I knew I walked around like my shit didn't stink so I guess other people picked up on that and could tell they could not get to me. I like to compare bullies to vultures. If a vulture is able to pick apart your flesh an make it bleed, it will continue to pick at it, and eventualy devour you. If your skin is too tough for the vulture, they might get bored with trying to pick on you and leave you be.
If you are being bullied in school, let a teacher or an administrator know. If it is occuring in your neighborhood or anywhere other than school, please let your parents know. I've even handled bully situations that happen in neighborhoods at the school level. Most of all, stick up for yourself. That does not mean start swinging...I mean don't let the bully see that it gets to you, walk away, laugh at them, do what