| -fatty- 2850 08.03.2004 13:51 |
This sounds a little complicated but it's good for a laugh. All you have to do is respond to the topic in a series of different styles of writing. There are ten styles of writing and once you get to the last one you start at the beginning again. Points can be awarded or taken away and once a week I will post the points table (If I can be arsed) The ten styles of writing are as follows POST ONE: BIBLICAL Your post should be written as if it were a passage in the bible. Lot's of 'Yea Verilys', Untos' and 'Spaketh the Lords' POST TWO: HILLBILLY Your second post should be written as if you were Cletus the slack jawed local from the Simpsons. So it might include the words Pesky, Varmint and Hot Dang. POST THREE: SUN JOURNALIST Your third post should be in the style of a sensationalised news story and you should refer to yourself in the third person. Something along the lines of 'Overweight buffoon fatty, 35 is believed to be responsible for the sexual molestation of 11 farmyard animals etc etc... POST FOUR: TED For those of you who are unfamiliar with the rantings of Ted, he is an ex-Queenzoner who wrote everything in caps and was a real nutter. A typical example of Ted's writing style might be 'YOU NEED TO WAKE UP AND SMELL THE FUCKING COFFEE. THIS IS A FUCKING COP OUT. AND SO ON AND SO FORTH. POST FIVE: YE OLDE ENGLANDE Your fifth post should be written as if you were living in 15th Century England and might sound like this. ' Prithee but I am of the opinion that the stout fellow who proclaims himself to be fatty is of unknown parentage and smells not unlike a Spaniard's cod piece. POST SIX: KINDERGARTEN Your sixth post should be written as if you were talking to a three year old. extra points will be given to those who sound really patronising. POST SEVEN: CHAD HANGING Your seventh post should be as long as you can possibly make it. Don't use one word when five will do and it might be handy to keep a thesaurus at hand. POST EIGHT: STEPFORD FAN No matter what the subject is, your eighth post should eventually get around to a Queen connection. POST NINE: VIOLENT No matter what you want to say in your ninth post, you have to get it across in the most aggressive way possible. POST TEN: NORMAL Your tenth post should be written in your normal style of writing. this is handy because it gives you a chance to get a point across or ask questions So there you have it. It sounds a bit long winded to start with but when you get different people posting in different styles it gets really funny (especially if your stoned when you read it) and don't worry if someone posts out of style telling you that your a sad bastard taking part in such a childish game. you can slag them off as long as you do it in the style of writing your post number dictates. And don't worry about keeping it up in other threads. it only counts in this one. If anyone has any questions then feel free to ask. Just try to do it in a biblical style to strt with. Off we go........ fatty |
| -fatty- 2850 08.03.2004 13:53 |
And so it came to pass that fatty who is called fatty did post an idea for a gloriously funny game and he did wait with breath abated for the first of what he did verily hope would be a million posts. Amen fatty. |
| -fatty- 2850 08.03.2004 13:55 |
Consarn it. You cotton pickin varmints sure are takin your sweet time. fatty. |
| -fatty- 2850 08.03.2004 14:27 |
QUEENZONE GAME SET TO TAKE WORLD BY STORM An amazing new game in which players are awarded points by writing messages in a pre-determined style was launched on the Queen fan site 'QUEENZONE'earlier today. The games creator Mr Fatty Arbuckle of Leith, Edinburgh chose to launch the game on a Queen message board because as he put it 'Queen fans are by far the most mentally unstable in the entire world. Fatty came up with the idea for the game only last night after smoking something. 'I came up with the idea for the game after smoking something last night' said the obese twat but there already claims from fatty's friends that the game originated over a drunken conversation with an African guy in an Edinburgh public house. 'That's a fucking lie! added fatty 'It was my idea and I have already pitched it in a board game version to MB Games. A spokesman for MB Games added 'We did recive a letter from fatty and we have instructed our lawyers to break his thumbs should he ever darken our door again. fatty. |
| ilizarov 08.03.2004 14:30 |
FATTY YOU NEED TO WAKE UP AND SMELL THE FUCKING COFFEE. THIS POST WILL JUST ENCOURAGE NIGGERS AND FAGGOTS AND OTHER WANKERS WHO ROB MY SHOP TO REPLY. |
| ilizarov 08.03.2004 14:30 |
TEST FUCK |
| YourValentine 08.03.2004 14:33 |
THIS IS A FUCKING COP OUT! A CONSPIRICY OF CHUD AND FATTY! THEY SEND THE RASTAFARIAN QUEEN FANS TO MY HOME THEY ALL LIVE ON WELFARE FROM MY TAX MONEY AND ROB MY SHOP! DARK MYUUTWO IS MY ONLY FIREND HERE FUCK IT! |
| ilizarov 08.03.2004 14:37 |
...TEST FUCK (While we are on the topic of ted, does anyone remember the audio file from TED about how him and his mates beat up a guy? It was many years ago but SOMEONE here must remember it....) |
| YourValentine 08.03.2004 14:42 |
Why,universal plodding poisons up the nimble spirit in the arteries, as motion and long-during action tires the sinewy vigour of the traveller.. |
| deleted user 08.03.2004 14:49 |
ROTFL |
| -fatty- 2850 08.03.2004 14:52 |
YOU FUCKERS NEED TO WAKE UP AND READ THE INSTRUCTIONS. YOUR FIRST POSTS SHOULD HAVE BEEN BIBLICAL. THIS IS MY FOURTH FUCKIN POST SO I SHOULD SOUND LIKE TED BUT YOU FUCKERS SHOULD HAVE STARTED OFF ON THE BIBLICAL STUFF. IT'S JUST A FUCKING COP OUT. FATTY. P.S THANKS FOR PLAYING. |
| YourValentine 08.03.2004 14:56 |
Try as hard as you can, you will never reach the beauty of Bohemian Rhapsody, the masterpiece of our dear departed Freddie. It's about him coming to terms with his sexuality and if you don't believe it you need to get a life and get laid pretty soon. (sorry I am a foreign language user, I cannot dream of doing a "Chad") |
| -fatty- 2850 08.03.2004 14:56 |
Gadzooks I neglected to explain the rules in a manner befitting such buffoons. Alas I fear I shall have to ponder until my tenth post to explain thine rules clearly. fatty. |
| YourValentine 08.03.2004 15:01 |
Screw your f***ng rules, we are not on QOL where we are told what we can post and what we can't. You are a SCUM BAG WAKE UP AND SMELL THE COFFEE (it's just too much fun, sorry) |
| -fatty- 2850 08.03.2004 15:01 |
All right children, let's go over this again. Now that I am in Kendergarten mode it might be a little clearer. When you first reply to this thread you should do it like the people in the bible. Do you remeber the bible? That was the thing you weren't allowed to touch at the nativity play last Christmas. Only and I can't be any clearer than this, Only when you get to your second post. Tht's the number after two. Only then can you write like a hillbilly. Then you go through the list one at a time until you get back to the bible again. So no points for anyone so far. fatty. |
| YourValentine 08.03.2004 15:06 |
Not fair:( |
| pma 08.03.2004 15:30 |
Thou shalt not pleasure yourself in public places. (yes..lame) |
| pma 08.03.2004 15:49 |
BillyBob: Pappy? Pappy: Ye? BillyBob: Pappy, how did yo' an' momma meet etch other? Pappy: Lissen hyar sonnie, ah was eight years old when ah met yer momma....mah parents were so proud of their nooborn chile...an' back then ah guess ah was proud t'have a noo sister. So thass how ah met yer momma. BillyBob: Was she purdy when yo' met her ? Pappy: No, as ah reckon she was rather fat, wrinkly, shittin' an' pissin' herse'f all th' time an' ah reckon th' only thin' thet shet her up was a stiff slap on th' skull. (lame, disgusting and stereotypical) |
| Daburcor? 08.03.2004 16:22 |
*laughith thyne self to death* Thyne Fatty hath one hell of a sense of humor. |
| geeksandgeeks 08.03.2004 16:52 |
And the Lord spaketh unto geeksandgeeks, "Go forth and spread the gospel of Queenzone!" And geeksandgeeks did such, and she spread the gospels of Queenzone on Synergy and Red Mosquito and IMDb and Murmurs and other such holy venues. And the Synergians said, "And why should we come to Queenzone, geeksandgeeks?*" And the Murmursians and Red Mosquitos and IMDbers gathered as well. And geeksandgeeks said, "Because the Lord spaketh to me and told me so." And so the Synergians came in droves, and with them they brought trolls. And Queenzone turned upside down. So the Lord said, "Let there be Queenonline." And the Queenzoners said, "Very funny, Lord. We already know about Queenonline." And the Lord's face fell, and he spaketh, "Oh." And the lord thought. And the Lord thought. And the Lord thought more. And finally, the Lord had his "Eureka!" moment. "I know!" crieth the Lord. And the Lord spaketh in a deep country voice and He spaketh, "LET THERE BE MISSISSIPPI!!!!!" And the Queenzoners sent the trolls to Mississippi. And the Lord smiledeth down upon his children and saw that it was good. And the Lord did not notice Charles Baer. *The Synergians know her as thewaxtadpole, the Murmursians know her as Pax Sklodowski, the Red Mosquitos know her as mandytheheadlessparakeet, and the IMDbers know her as mysticweevil. |
| Flashman 08.03.2004 17:57 |
Lo! It came to pass that fatty did offer his wisdom upon QueenZone and verily, the numpties of the Zone did not take guidance from his words but did balls it up to a very large extent. And fatty begat a right benny, and worked himself up into a great fury and popped his right bollock. And it was said that because of this rage, the numpties of QueenZone would have to suffer the return of Jake for a hundred years, or until such a time that they would earn forgiveness. And they were well pissed. And fatty did laugh. For fatty was indeed the son of a bitch and took great delight in their displeasure. And then Carol Vorderman came on. And fatty did have a bit of a wank. And then Richard Whiteley came on. And the moment was lost. Amen. |
| Flashman 08.03.2004 18:04 |
Jake the Hillbilly: "Hot Damn, etc. Slap my thigh and that. Look at dem beans! I'm in love with my tractor, got a feel for my oversized wheel. Get a grip on my combined harvester. Shag my pig and make the thing squeal." *Scratches head.* |
| Flashman 08.03.2004 18:18 |
JAKE THE JERK JUMPS TRACTORS: IT'S OFFICIAL AND IT'S ONLY IN YOUR GLORIOUS SUN! +++ Tits Galore On Page 54. We at your Glorious Sun, Britain's best selling daily bog paper, can EXCLUSIVELY reveal that convicted tractor rapist Jake Britt is set for a SENSATIONAL return to the nation's eighth favourite Queen based message board 'QueenZone'. One QueenZoner, Flashman, told the Sun "Fuck off, you scrawny looking bastard. Get off my land, or I'll have you shot to within an inch of your life." Another QueenZone regular, Danno said "LMAO!" whilst MexQueenFM roared "Ditto." We thought up some hilarious Queen referenced song titles relating to this story that had us quite literally in stitches in the office:- 'Jake Wants To Break Free', 'I Want To Break Jake', 'I Want to Jake Free' - and then we ran out. (Turn to page 4 for more EXCLUSIVE dirty photos) PLUS! SEXY SAM'S SECRETS TO GINORMOUS JUGS - Pages 12,13,15,16,17 and 25. |
| Daburcor? 08.03.2004 21:37 |
Ah reckon thisere topics nuttin butta wayda make peepul sound stoopid. Guhd jaaab fatteh. Heyuck! *spits out his 'chew'. |
| siljeoen 09.03.2004 05:53 |
And the Holy God said to Richard:"Let there be Queenzone" and then it was Queenzone.And the God saw that it was good and the people saw that it was good.But then Jake showed up and the whole place went to hell. Amen. |
| Polar Bear 09.03.2004 07:15 |
Lo, THy game burst forth fitfully accroos thy holy screen. |
| Polar Bear 09.03.2004 07:17 |
dangnabit Billy Sue, this here pitchfork sure make poking those pesky com-pu-ta buttons dang hard. MAAAA get me my shot-Gun, dang machines messing my bean crop, dang. |
| Lawyeris 09.03.2004 07:42 |
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| Lawyeris 09.03.2004 07:44 |
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| YourValentine 09.03.2004 07:46 |
Please edit your post, Silent Assasin, you make the page unreadable. |
| Fenderek 09.03.2004 09:09 |
That's a great game, fatty, but it would be nicer if we could talk about Queen- such a great band it was... IT STILL IS!!! Their music will never die...!!!! They were great, awesome, absolutely amazing!!! Oh My God, how wonderful music they created... How I love them- they're so great... They're HUGE!!! And Bohemian Rhapsody is the best song in last 3659 years- and all of them are so good, so unique... And their latest advert with such a great stars... And this duet with Robbie... And everything they've ever done- it's so freaking PERFECT!!!! They're so goog, god damn, they're so fuckin' good, absolutely bloody great... GREAT, GREAT , GREAT..... That's what we shoul talk about- not some games- you're not a real fan, fatty.... |
| siljeoen 09.03.2004 13:00 |
hey,what d'ya mean with that? |
| pma 09.03.2004 14:30 |
SHOCK EXTRA! Queenzoner has life! We're proud to EXCLUSIVELY report that our photographers have been able to capture one Queenzone member outside of his house, away from his keyboard, buying himself a life. More on this SHOCKING revelation on page 7. |
| deleted user 09.03.2004 16:03 |
And the Lord God came to Eddie while he slept. He stood and looked at his creation, and thought it good. 'Eddie just sleeps here in Eden Father' the Lord said. And lo He had an idea. 'I will take a rib from Eddie, and with it he shall create a hog.' And so did the Lord on the 8th day, and saw that it was good. |
| deleted user 09.03.2004 16:12 |
HOT DANG! What a sweeeeeet hog that is Eddie!' 'Yep. Sure is' Willie said. 'I've been givin' it to 'er evry night, and she don't squeall or not'in. I heard tell that hogs like a good humpin'. And she sure does let me tell ye. Mmmmhmmm. |
| deleted user 09.03.2004 16:17 |
This just in: The so called back wood brothers have just been arrested by the ASPCA of Kentucky. It seems that they have been, as they have called it, 'humpin the daylights' out of several missing hogs in this backwoods community of Southfork. Public cries of animal cruelty have been heard since this story broke just hours before our News 8 team arrived on the scene. Here is an interview taken just moments ago. Before we air this, please keep your children from the tv. |
| Daburcor? 09.03.2004 16:23 |
IT WAS ALL A MISTAKE... SURE WAS, A HUGE ONE! It seems that Mr. Dan Corson, 20, of Concord Nc, Has finally gone off his rocker! "We just heard him scream..." said his brother, "...We went to check on him and saw him standing in the corner, drooling like a fool saying 'It was all a mistake...' over and over again." Mr. Corson has been commited to the psyche ward at an undislosed location, Where he can get the lobotomy that he so richly deserves. The bastard. THAT oughtta teach HIM. Don't screw the chinese mafia out of due paymnent Dan, It can ONLY end VERY badly for you... And all those you care for. GWAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!! |
| deleted user 09.03.2004 16:23 |
WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE?! THOSE ARE THE NIGGERS THAT TOOK MY HOGS! THEY ARE THE SAME FUCKERS THAT BROKE INTO MY SHOP AND STOLE MY CASE OF RUBBERS.SONS OF BITCHES SEND 'EM ON A BOAT TO WHERE THEY CAME FROM Sir. This must be a shock to you seeing the men who stole your hogs. How can you be sure that they are the same men? WHAT? YOU CRAZY BITCH ALL NIGGERS LOOK THE SAME THE ROBBED MYSHOP THEY DID. WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO WAKE UP AND SMELL THE FUCKING COFFEE!!!!!! Thats all for now John, back to you in the studio. |
| inu-liger 09.03.2004 16:39 |
1) Thou shall not speak of the devil himself, the Dark Lord Dark_Myuutwo 2) Hot dang! I just got me a bunch o' tickets to Dances With Fawhks (Forks)"! 3) EXCLUSIVE!! RICHARD CAUGHT IN THE ACT OF GAY ANIMAL SEX! PICTURES INSIDE!! 4) SHUT THE FUCK UP, ASSHOLE! THIS IS A FUCKING COP OUT!! SMELL THE COFFEE!! 5) Oh dear. Peeves, could you be a jolly good lad and fetch me my slippers, dear boy? 6) And this, children, is a "Po---key-mon" card. See this one, it's Pikachu! Peeee-kaaaa-chhhuuuu. He is my faaaaavoorrrite Pokemon (note: not really). Would you like to hold the card? :) 7) Dark_Myuutwo is without a doubt the most intransigent person I have ever known. His views are very démodéd. I have forever lost all respect for him. He should not even be allowed to post here anymore, if he continues to bash gay people and promote hate, and continue as well to work with TED. (sorry I ran out of ideas on how to make this a long one - but I used a thesaurus) 8) I know for a fact that Bob Mayo helped write a song for Pokemon, or if not played on a Pokemon song, on the 2BA Master album. He in the 80's performed at a concert that Roger Taylor of Queen was at later in the event. 9) You fucking little bitch-ass mother fucker. I am going to fucking kill you and punch your face in until you've eaten your fucking little BABY teeth you never popped out before!! 10) What is the purpose of this whole game? |
| Daburcor? 09.03.2004 16:42 |
Dark... WAKE UP AND SMELL THE COFFEE!!! POKEMON IS FOR KIDS DAMNIT! |
| -fatty- 2850 09.03.2004 17:30 |
Well it's been one whole day since the game began and at the time of writing this thread stands at 3 pages. That's not bad for a post that's only been up one day. Ok so it might not be very good but at least it's popular It took a whle for some members to cotton onto the fact that you have to start your own series of posts with the biblical version and so on and so forth. Most folk have got the hang of it now (except Dark of course). It seems as though a lot of you are racing through all ten posts at once in an attempt to finish the game. That's not the way it works. The idea was to start a normal disccussion but answer in a given style. For example, say we were having a discussion about Dark Myuutwo being an odd young chap. Someone might want to politely correct Dark on a factual error in one of his earlier posts, but his next style of writing is Ted's. Let's say the poster wanted to say "I think you'll find you are mistaken." He or she would have to write "YOU FUCKING COCKSUCKING FAGGOT-YOU COULDN'T TELL YOUR ASS FROM YOUR FUCKIN FACE. YOU NEED TO WAKE UP AND SMELL THE COFFEE ITS A FUCKING COP OUT." Dark naturally takes umbridge at being called a cock sucking faggot and decides that foul language may be called on apon if he is to force his opinion to the opposite end of the cock sucking spectrum. Unfortuneatly Dark's next style of writing (if he ever gets the hand of it) is that of a nursery school teacher. He has to reply "Now it was very naughty of you to suggest that I suck men's wee wees. I think you should go and face the corner and think about what a silly boy you've been." So once you have a good discussion going, or a fight if we are lucky and we get everyone putting their tuppence in in different styles. Well it get's pretty funny (at least it does if your smoking what I'm smoking) Well this was my Chad post and I think I've gone on for at least the length of one of his sentences. I think it might be a good idea if we ditch the Chad post and replace it with a post in which you must get your point across in the form of a poem. What do you think? Remember to answer in the appropriate style. fatty. |
| Spiderleg Synthia 10.03.2004 04:39 |
And upon reading the might post by scott who was called fatty, Synthia of Spiderleg did decide that Queenzone was much more exciting than work. And she did post in the thread foretold to be the best in the world... Ever. But she did feel despondant. And this was the reaon why. As was her custom, she logged into The Zone of Queen to find out new tidings of her most favoured dead band, and to read of the locals making merry sport of Queen's latest commercial decisions and Queenfans who were not as knowledgable and witty as they. And she did have an almighty vision. For TED who said he was of Maryhill or some such godawful region of Glasgow but who was in reality from Ireland or somewhere had posted a topic entitle TEST FUCK. And tears did come to her eyes, and she did feel a wave of love for the Zone of Queen, for it reminded her of her newbie days, when such true believers as Chad of the large Hanging and the Opposition did leave mightly post that did take days to read. And fervently she did click on the TEST FUCK. And her stupid fucking school bastarding firewall didn't let her in. Bollocks. |
| siljeoen 10.03.2004 05:44 |
NEWS FLASH!! -GEEKS SPAM QUEENZONE! The last days geeks have been spamming the "forum testing" area on Queenzone.-Unnessesary stupid posts to raise their post-counts."Those posts don't count,-it sucks" sais fellow QZ-ers.The involved unnamed persons are not aviable for comments. |
| pma 10.03.2004 06:02 |
YOU FILTHY FUCKFACES! I KNOW YOU ARE ALL IN ON THIS TOGETHER! THIS THREAD, THIS ENTITY, YOU ARE ALL IN IT! THE RASTAFARIAN QUEEN FANS! THEY KILLED Freddie! MY MATE CAN PROVE IT! TEA TASTES LIKE DISHWATER! YOU NEED TO WAKEUP AND SMELL THE FUKIN COFFEE! |
| siljeoen 10.03.2004 08:39 |
HEY WHAT DO YA MEAN? HUH!? ARE YOU BLAMING ME? IM NOT THE BRAIN BEHIND IT,FUCKER!!I'VE GOT NOTHING TO DO WITH IT,SO SHUT DA FUCK UP AND SMELL THE FUCKIN COFFEE!!! |
| Erin 10.03.2004 10:14 |
It came to past that Erin did check the noticeboard after 40 days and 40 nights. She saw a fatty post. And it was good. |
| Erin 10.03.2004 10:17 |
Hot dang, I shore am glad dares a type a talkin' on dis here thread that I's good at. Dis here's normal talkin' where's I'm frum...:-B |
| deleted user 10.03.2004 11:12 |
LOL Erin |
| -fatty- 2850 10.03.2004 13:44 |
You lot call yourelves Queen fans? Freddie would be spinning in his grave if he could see what you have done to this thread. fatty. |
| Daburcor? 10.03.2004 14:13 |
"Dis here's normal talkin' where's I'm frum...:-B" *busts a gut laughting* LOOK AT THE TEETH!!! LMAO!!! |
| Starchild 10.03.2004 16:29 |
Verily I say unto you: wherefore hast thou placed this post in the "Queen" section? Surely, O Fatty, thou shouldst have placed it into the section that is marked "Personal"? |
| Starchild 10.03.2004 16:35 |
hyuk hyuk yea i likes the poem eye-deer y'all. Ah don't want no long posts, they's a-kinda hard ta read all in one go, an as for that chad hangin' that no-good low-down sonofabitch... (no offence intended) well, i likes po-tree yes siree Ah don't wanna be sittin' here with no god-damn dictionary y'hear me? |
| siljeoen 11.03.2004 06:07 |
what are ye talking about? |
| siljeoen 11.03.2004 06:14 |
And Teds right hand man,you must try to understand that you can't use that kind of language.You can hurt someones feelings..And try to speak a bit lower,you don't have to scream.-Be a good boy now and go wash your hands. |
| Little_Queenie 11.03.2004 20:03 |
And the seventh day God read these posts. And he laughed so loud he woke up his dad. And God saw it is not good, not good at all. So God had to go to sleep unless He wanted His ass to become kicked. |