*Raises right arm*
Hi my name's Archie and I'm a Stepford fan.
I believe John Deacon is the 4th best singer of all time.
I believe Hot Space is in the top ten albums of all time.
I believe music was created in 1973 and nothing of any worth existed before that time, unless Freddie was involved.
Anybody who disses Queen is obviously an idiot and should bugger off to a Sting website.
Ah that's better. I'm glad I've come out.
*stands up*
Hi everyone, my name is Uglyduckling and I....I am a Queenaholic.
*cries*
Its so good to get that out of my system....(*sniff*)...for so long now I have been unable to admit I had a problem (to myself as well as others) and to finally be able to do it without being judged, its....well, its.... I LOVE YOU GUYS!!
Group hug!
Life was so hard for me. I used to wander the streets, thinking of nothing but where the next bottle of Queen was going to come from. Strangers wouold yell 'stepford' at me as I walked by. Sometimes I would just sit on the wall outside Woolworths all day just listening to Queen and watchind the world go by. People would cross the road to avoid being near me, clutching their children and staring over their shoulders as they hurried away.
My family tried to help, but I would yell and scream if they tried to hide my discman. Once a friend of mine came over and emptied all my Queen CDs down the sink, but I fished them out again, I was that desperate.
I tried to quit, many times. I would go away for a few days to somewhere where I had no access to Queen, but the withdrawal symptoms were terribe. I would start to shake, get a terrible headache and feel hot and cold at the same time. I would always end up coming home again and bingeing on Queen, and then pass out on the floor. I found I couldn't even go one day without Queen.
I checked myself into rehab, but it was hell. The nurses tried to give you a 'healthy' dose of Chris DeBurgh every few hours to take the edge off the cravings, but it didn't work. There was just no substitute for Queen.
And then I found Jesus.
In this example, someone who believes Queen can do no wrong. Even if Roger emptied LSD into the world's water supply, a stepford would say, "Reality was becoming too stressful anyway."
The first meeting of Stepfords Anonymous will be held on...well. Maybe I shouldn't tell you where it will be held. The stepfords treated here are far, far worse.
C'mon, guys, it's not so bad here.