Never let it be said that I don't have my finger on the pulse of this board. To prove it, type any subject you like in this thread, and I will say something negative about it.
masturbation - the loneliest sex act of all...
jaffa cakes - too small
Ozzie barmaids - live too far away
james cagney - has really let himself go recently
not proven - pointless arbitrary purgatorial waste of space between "Guilty" and "Innocent" which the Scots will continue to use until the medical profession start putting "Not Proven" as an option on pregnancy tests.
Gandhi - crap film
threesomes - I don't have enough tongues to keep up with my brain
myself - unemployed drain on the country's resources
life - a pointless exercise
sex - generates life, see above
physics - why find out WHY things fall? we can see that they do!
philosophy - why think about why we're here? it's pointless
karl marx - silly beard
Margaret Thatcher - took away my school milk thus depriving me of calcium and stunting my growth
Rowan Atkinson - overrated comic
Brian May - used to be an excellent songwriter
Freddie Mercury - used to be an excellent songwriter
Bizarrely, the last ones were the easiest
blow jobs - make kissing taste weird...
girls who swallow - don't wear T shirts proclaiming the fact
dumb good looking blondes - always make crap breakfast
miss BJ - have no sense of timing
winning the lotto - generates begging letters
Pele - won't admit that he does need viagra
Guinness - - generates some shite adverts
F&L in Las Vegas - Terry Gilliam's worst film
Denmark - idiot country who want to be in Europe, but keep voting against it.
Holly's little Pony - shits all over the patio
Jeremy Beadle - has a silly beard and has nothing to show for his life except the humiliation of others
Cure for cancer - has not been found
cure for aids - will be overpriced by greedy drugs companies
cure for stupidity - would wipe out too great a proportion of the human race
cure for laziness - would create too much demand on leisure services and the employment market
peace on earth - would render all religion superfluous, creating mass unemployment and/or suicide of priests etc
Dark Mowtoo - is a Welsher
the thing with the pencil - your hands get all sweaty trying to grasp it, making actually doing so less and less likely
A-ha! Got you!
There is nothing remotely bad to say about a decent set of tits and that's a fact even Pythagoras agreed with. And you can't argue with that kind of science so that's an end to it.
Flashman 1 - P_G 0
Actually no, it's 2 - 0 to me because I was playing my joker and you go to minus 5.
OK, just this once....
"a decent set of tits" - is too often combined with either a face like a bulldog or a personality like Dark's, or in serious cases, both.
No, but it is a negative statement about the subject given.
Can't sleep Flash? Try cracking one out and having a shot of brandy with your warm milk. You'll soon drop off
"blow jobs - make kissing taste weird..."
Scary. But tasteless, too (ha! get it?).
Hey! they just started making this thing that you might want to try to get that taste to go away; it's called SOAP. Works on cheese, too...
Liechtenstein – So freakin small
black colour – Hard to see at night
hoover Henry – Has no apparent relation to Herbert Hoover
this Noticeboard – This topic
bootlegs – YOU’RE A PARASITIC BASTARD!
Red Special – There’s only one of them
bi-sexual girlfriend – Could cheat on you for your sister