*What do Ayrton Senna and Freddie Mercury have in common?
They both died with blood on their helmets.
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My wife came home from work crying yesterday and asked me to console her.
So I hit her over the head with my Xbox.
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A guy goes to the pub, and says to his friend, "You won't believe what happened! I was taking a shortcut along the railway track, and I found a girl tied to the rails. I untied her, and we had sex over and over again. All the positions; everything!"
His friend replies, "That's great! Did you get a blowjob?"
A stari mu odgovori: "Bio mi te pun kurac pa sam te poslao u picku materinu!"
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I fucking love that one! HAHAHAHAHA... it always makes me laugh. HAHAHAHAHA. I'm sorry, this joke loses it's sense when I translate it so I'll leave it this way. :-)
Yogurt wrote:
Mark and Eric are at a bar.
Mark: I got a letter from an angry man. He threatened to kill me if I continued to sleep with his wife.
Eric: Then why don't you stop sleeping with her.
Mark: It's not that easy.
Eric: Why?
Mark: He didn't sign his name at the bottom.
Ms. Rebel wrote:
Pita sin svog starog: "Tata, kako sam ja nastao?"
A stari mu odgovori: "Bio mi te pun kurac pa sam te poslao u picku materinu!"
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I fucking love that one! HAHAHAHAHA... it always makes me laugh. HAHAHAHAHA. I'm sorry, this joke loses it's sense when I translate it so I'll leave it this way. :-)
Hahaha... You're sick. Seek help.
Here's one, I'm not sure if you've heard this one before. Lots of incest and sex.
Lisa, aged 8, wants a pony.
She goes to father, begging him for hours.
Her father finally says "Fine, but on one condition: You perform fellatio on me."
To which she answered, "Daddy, what's that?", looking very innocent and all.
Father explained. And the girl agreed.
But as she inserted his penis into her mouth, a look of disgust came upon her face.
"Daddy, this tastes like poo!"
And father replied, "Why, of course... your little brother wanted a skateboard, didn't he?"
Ms. Rebel wrote:
Pita sin svog starog: "Tata, kako sam ja nastao?"
A stari mu odgovori: "Bio mi te pun kurac pa sam te poslao u picku materinu!"
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I fucking love that one! HAHAHAHAHA... it always makes me laugh. HAHAHAHAHA. I'm sorry, this joke loses it's sense when I translate it so I'll leave it this way. :-)
Is "stari" the official word for father or a slang word for "the old one" ? And please what is "pun kurac pa sam" the rest is surprisingly understandable for me :)
Ms. Rebel wrote:
Pita sin svog starog: "Tata, kako sam ja nastao?"
A stari mu odgovori: "Bio mi te pun kurac pa sam te poslao u picku materinu!"
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I fucking love that one! HAHAHAHAHA... it always makes me laugh. HAHAHAHAHA. I'm sorry, this joke loses it's sense when I translate it so I'll leave it this way. :-)
Is "stari" the official word for father or a slang word for "the old one" ? And please what is "pun kurac pa sam" the rest is surprisingly understandable for me :)
LOL... It's a slang word for "the old one". "Bio mi te pun kurac pa sam te" means something like "My dick was full of you so I've.." xD We use that one => "pun mi te kurac" when we are sick of somebody. :-)
He found three such girls in a local pub, a blonde, a brunette and a redhead.
To the blonde he said, " I am the PM of England. Now how much would it cost for me to spend time with you?
She replied, '200 pounds'
To the brunette he asked the same question. Her reply was '100 pounds'
He then asked the redhead
Her reply was "Mr. PM, if you can get my skirt up as high as my taxes, my knickers as low as my wages, get that thing as hard as the times we are living in, and keep it rising like the price of petrol, keep me warmer than it is in my flat, and fuck me the way you have the pensioners, then it isnt going to cost you a bloody penny!'